Luigi The Lion Cat Makes Coffee or The Bean Story
It was noon on a hot day, and Luigi The Lion Cat was feeling extra lazy. A daze had been overtaking him, his mind was adrift half in dream and his muscles could do naught but relax. His breath was slow and time had lost meaning. Then Rocky arrived.
“Hey Luigi! Hey Luigi! What are you up to my bro?!” exclaimed Rocky. “He shoots in as if he were lightning, and now comes the thunder of his yammering” thought Luigi to himself as he half rose to face his pest of a little brother. “What am I up to? Nothing you gray buffoon, absolutely nothing. In fact, until this moment, I was not UP at all!” meowed Luigi at Rocky in an irritated tone. The little gray fluff stared at Luigi, unaffected. “That’s cool! Want to go on an adventure?” Rocky asked Luigi. The orange cat wanted to give a snarky reply, but he simply lacked the energy to do so. Instead, Luigi slumped onto the floor, took a small breath and said “No.” Rocky, who was practically bursting with energy, accepted his brother’s reply with an “Okay!” and flew off back into the depths of their home.
“Meow where does he get the energy to prance around like that all day?” Luigi thought to himself. “Running around like some silly kitten is a waste of time for a high brow cat like me, but I can’t even stand up without wanting to take a nap right after. I need energy!”
Luigi brainstormed ideas on how to energize himself, and his thoughts kept coming back to one simple answer. “When the humans are tired they go to the kitchen and drink something that fills them with energy,” he thought. “It’s the bean! I must master the bean, the coffee bean, and then I will have mastered energy itself!” Luigi meowed to himself, and feeling as though he had found an answer to his troubles gave him a little energy with which to accomplish his new goal: making a cup of coffee.
A quick trip online to read articles and watch some videos, and Luigi had learned all that he needed. “First, I must retrieve the bean!” Luigi meowed as he climbed up on the kitchen counter and grabbed the bag of coffee beans that belonged to his humans. He dragged the bag over to a grinder, and poured the beans from the bag in. Activating the grinder, the orange cat purred and meowed with excitement. “Yes, turn to dust! Now you are essence of bean, essence of energy!” Luigi yelled, though the sound was lost to the loud grinding of coffee beans. Satisfied, Luigi turned off the grinder and poured the resulting coffee into the humans’ coffee maker. Luigi reached his fluffy paw out and began pressing buttons on the machine until it made the right noises that he recognized as coffee being made. Water boiled in the machine and poured through the grinded beans, then was filtered and poured into a cup that Luigi placed below.
Luigi stared in amazement at the cup, now full of dark liquid. “There it is, a fuel so black and pure. With this, I, Luigi the Lion Cat, will be unstoppable!” the ball of orange fuzz thought to himself. He lifted the cup with his paws and gulped down the coffee, then lowered the empty cup. “Aaaaahhhh hot hot hot, that is hot and bitter!” Luigi meowed while sticking his tongue out to cool. “Now I have to wait for it to work,” he thought, and returned to where he had been laying earlier to await the effects.
Moments later, a fire began to rise within the little lion. “Oooh, what energy, what strength! This is amazing!” Luigi meowed excitedly. “I must test out this energy and see how far it goes,” he thought, and began to run around the room. He ran on tables, jumped on chairs and couches, ducked beneath cabinets and climbed onto shelves on the wall. Round and round he went, the orange fur became an orange blur. Minutes passed, then hours, then night had come and finally Luigi began to slow. “Oh meow, my muscles don’t want to move anymore! That means it’s time to take a nap!” Luigi dragged himself to a comfortable spot in the corner and closed his eyes. But the gates to dreamland were not opening and as the minutes ticked away, the cat lost patience. “What is this meow! I want to sleep now! Is this the fault of the bean?!” Luigi meowed with frustration. Hours passed in darkness, and Luigi turned and rolled and shifted, but could not fall asleep. As the sun began to rise and morning came, the anxious tired cat finally felt his eyes shutting and his brain turning off. “Aaah, my misery is coming to an end…” Luigi thought, and he fell into a deep slumber. Only a few hours later, and everyone else in the house was up again and making noise. Luigi awoke still tired with too little rest. “Oh meow, now I’m more tired than ever. This coffee stuff was a mistake! Anything that stands between me and good sleep is as evil as water or unwanted belly rubs!” Luigi thought, and began counting the seconds until it was quiet around him so he could go back to sleep.